Finally. He smiled, sipping his coffee and watching the activity through the kitchen window. He recognized most of the construction workers and his arm started to feel a little tired of lifting it in short greetings. Finally some action.
His smile grew when he noticed the man approaching the kitchen door and Luke unlocked and opened it.
“Hi Dave.”
“Luke,” both men shook hands, “It’s good to see you again. In person, that is. I’ve seen you on TV a lot…”
Luke grinned. “You want my autograph?”
“As a matter of fact…” Dave pulled out some papers from his bag, “I do want your signature on these. But let me show you my new ideas for the outbuildings first.”
Dave McTaylor enjoyed the sparkle in the brown eyes in front of him. He loved Luke’s unbridled enthusiasm and realized he’d missed their talks more than he already knew.
“I’m so excited,” Luke actually clapped his hands, “I’m sure it’s great.”
“I think so,” Dave gave him a full smile. He didn’t mention the many hours he’d been racking his brain over this. He liked Luke. A lot. So he wanted to come up with something special. And he knew he did, but watching Luke being completely in awe was the best confirmation he could have asked for.
“This is…” Luke shook his head, staring at the drawings on the table, “…absolutely brilliant.”
“I’m glad,” Dave looked like the proverbial cat that ate the canary, “I know I’ve abandoned our original plans with this, but it does tie all the buildings together in a very natural way.”
“It does,” Luke kept staring at the plans. “I just love this glass corridor from the house to the other buildings.”
“Yeah, it works out great. It will merge into the surroundings, but it gives a dry and warm passage. As we discussed on the phone I planned a small classroom area in the library building.”
Dave pointed at the more detailed plans for the buildings and Luke kept smiling.
“You gave us our own little village,” he chuckled and Dave nodded.
“It’s your own little LukeVille alright. Please let me know if you want a diner in there too,” he teased, making Luke laugh out loud.
“Don’t even mention that idea to Reid…”
Something tugged at his heart when Dave saw the loving glow in the brown eyes. Apparently everything was still peachy in paradise.
“He’s not home?” It was a rhetorical question, because he’d noticed Reid’s car was gone.
“Nope. Early shift. And the kids are at my Uncle Seth’s place with their teacher and Will.”
“Smart thinking. The first few weeks will be very noisy.”
“Yeah, we reckoned,” Luke pointed at the coffee machine. “Want some coffee?”
“Please. I need you to go over some details for the other building site. The housing project will start in a few days and I need your final approval on some changes.”
***
“Hey Luke, good to see you.” Doctor Lynn Michaels smiled her calm smile and Luke returned it with a beaming one.
“Thanks. Same here.”
He wasn’t being polite. He loved his sessions with Dr. Michaels, especially after the whole doctor-patient dynamic had dissolved and their talks had become more equal. Sharing ideas and insights. Being both teacher and student at the same time. Luke loved that. It felt like sparring with Reid.
“You look very pleased with yourself,” Lynn gave him an approving nod and Luke grinned.
“I am. I just had a meeting with my architect-slash-contractor and we’re creating something very special, both at home and across the street from here. I’m proud of that.”
“That’s good,” Lynn felt genuinely happy. She remembered the insecure Luke very vividly and enjoyed his personal growth.
“It feels good,” Luke agreed, “just to be able to feel proud, without the need to belittle my own accomplishments. It’s powerful.”
“It is. Especially because your accomplishments are in a direct line with your passion,” Lynn pointed out. “That’s where the greatest power is. You obviously have a talent for creating, so the moment you put your energy in that, you’ll feel the power.”
Luke nodded.
“True. But creating is a wide-ranging notion, so that can also overwhelm me.”
“Good point. You’ll have to prioritize what you’re most passionate about.”
Luke laughed. “Easier said than done. I love writing, but somehow I just don’t get around doing that and it feels…” Luke lowered his head.
“It feels like what?”
When Luke didn’t answer, Lynn repeated her question a little more firm.
“It feels like what, Luke?”
“Failure.”
It had been a whisper, but Lynn heard it and to Luke’s surprise she nodded.
“Yeah, that’s how we’re programmed,” she smiled, drawing Luke’s undivided attention. “We all have a tendency to focus on the stuff we don’t do, the stuff we don’t have and the stuff we don’t like.”
“You too?” Luke looked confused and Lynn laughed.
“Yep, me too. And you know what? I’m glad I do.”
Now Luke was even more confused.
“You do?”
“I do. Remember our previous talk? Feeling like a failure gives us the opportunity to focus on the things we do, the things we have and the things we do like.”
“Ah yes, of course. I had this conversation with my father, a few days ago. How I can use my insecurity to make a conscious choice to focus on what I’m good at.”
“And did Holden like that theory?”
“Actually it was Damian.”
“Oh,” Lynn looked surprised. “I didn’t realize you two are that close again.”
“We’re getting there,” Luke smiled. “I’m taking it one step at a time. I’ve trusted him before and that didn’t turn out so well.”
“I understand your reluctance, but on the other hand… did he really manage to damage your core? Sure, you were disappointed and it hurt your feelings, but did his behavior alter who you really are?”
Luke had to think about that one.
“I guess not,” he eventually concluded, “It made me cautious about him, but that’s about it.”
“Exactly,” Lynn nodded. “Don’t overestimate the effect someone has on you. Nobody has a hold over you, unless you give them that power. He is just a good feeder. He triggers emotional stuff you can use to set your own course in life.”
After Luke’s nod – Lynn could tell her client really started to get her message – she continued.
“And it’s the same with emotions. They don’t have a hold over you, unless you give them that power. So when you feel like a failure, just use it as a messenger. That feeling tells you you’re focusing on the ‘what’s not there’ side, so you can make the switch by focusing on the ‘what is there’ side. That’s the name of the game. The conscious choice between cooperation and sabotage. Between solidarity and separation. Between gratitude and dissatisfaction. Between abundance and poverty. Between love and fear.”
For a moment Luke just stared at her, then he gave her a beaming smile.
“I’m getting it.”
“I can see that,” Lynn grinned. Moments like this always filled her with deep thankfulness. For her own experiences, for her own lessons and for this opportunity to pass it along as little seeds that would grow at their own pace and place.
“So let’s talk about your writing…” she suggested and Luke moved to the edge of his seat.
